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Douglas Tilley, LCSW

Relationship Blog...
An Open Conversation

Ingredients for a Successful Relationship

7/23/2015

6 Comments

 
Picture
I sit in my office with a man saying to me, “I feel so lonely in our relationship.  It is like I don’t exist.  My wife walks by and doesn’t acknowledge me.”  Then he says something I have heard many times… “I would rather be alone on my own than lonely in a relationship.”  Research tells us that loneliness and living private lives in relationships are strong predictors that the couple will break up.  Now, I want to assure you that feeling lonely at times in a relationship doesn’t mean you are on the road to separation.   But when people in relationships feel lonely, both partners had better take notice.  Relationships are vulnerable to neglect and typically don’t get better without working on them. 

So why am I starting a blog about healthy relationships with a discussion about loneliness?   Because, if you want a healthy relationship, you need to create a relationship that is an antidote to loneliness – where partners feel connected.   Since we are all so different, there are probably as many ways to feel connected as there are couples in the world.  What makes people feel connected and not lonely?  Comments? Questions?
6 Comments

    Douglas Tilley, LCSW
       moderator

    This Blog is a place to express thoughts,  feelings and reflections about life and relationships.  Anyone who has been in a relationship is welcome to contribute.  We all benefit from hearing others' personal views.  I very much appreciate  hearing from each of you. Remember, this is an open discussion and is not private and not confidential.  You do not need to identify yourself but please only post information you are comfortable  sharing in a public forum.  Others may comment on your views. Thanks so much for taking the time to post your thoughts and feelings.   Doug

    I do not present any actual  case material.  All examples are general and common to clinical practice and any specifics presented  are fictitious.  

    I reserve the right to filter/remove postings I consider off topic or inappropriate. 

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